Extra Help for Word Choice

  • Write clearly.
  • Use minimal jargon.
  • Avoid redundancy: It is redundant to say “10 a.m. Thursday morning.” Instead: The surgery begins at 10 a.m. Thursday.
  • Generally speaking, use active voice. The active voice makes prose sharper and more engaging. The subject of a sentence using the active voice performs an action. In the passive voice, the person doing the acting is the object instead of the subject of the sentence. Active voice: Now you can manage your health care online with new, user-friendly tools. Passive Voice: Health care can now be managed by you online with new, user-friendly tools.
  • Gender neutrality is encouraged in all communications, but avoid using he/she and him/her constructions, which are clumsy, and “one” constructions (One must always be aware of one’s conduct), which sound too stiff. Use articles, whenever possible, over gender-specific pronouns. Original: The nurse manages charts for her group. Better alternative: The nurse manages charts for the group. It might also be possible to go from a specific, singular construction to a general, plural construction: Nurses manage charts for their groups.
  • When talking about people with a disease, condition or disability, always use “people-first” language. Original: The people on the panel were an addict, a diabetic and quadriplegic. Better alternative: The people on the panel were a person in recovery, someone with diabetes and someone with a physical disability. Original: She’s autistic, and he’s wheelchair bound. Better alternative: She has been diagnosed with autism, and he uses a wheelchair. Also, don’t mention their condition unless relevant to the story and if a licensed medical professional has formally diagnosed the person.
  • Terms like “afflicted with,” “stricken with,” “suffers from” and “victim of” carry the assumption that a person with a disability is suffering or has a reduced quality of life. It is preferable to use neutral language when describing a person who has a disability, simply stating the facts about the nature of the disability. For example, it’s not, “Brown suffers from epilepsy,” but say instead, “Brown has been diagnosed with epilepsy” or simply “has epilepsy.”
  • Do not use “as well as” when there is already an “and” or an “also” in the sentence.
  • Use “include” or “including” to introduce a series when the items that follow are only part of the total. You don’t need to end a sentence like this with “among others” or “and more” or “etc.” because using “include” implies that you’re not providing a complete list. The hospital departments include cardiology and neurology. (Of course, the hospital has many more departments that focus on other specialties.)
  • Watch your subject-verb agreement, and remember that “the company,” “the board of directors” and “the council” are all “it.” The Board of Directors voted against a fee increase, saying it did not want to burden people. Too often, we want to turn bodies or agencies into “they.”
  • “Apparently,” “potentially,” “possibly” and any other qualifying words should be avoided when possible; always try for specific and concrete. On the other hand, things are rarely the “first” or “only,” so if you’re going to use these words, make sure they’re accurate. Use the proper background material to eliminate so-called qualifiers.
  • Terms like “older adults” or “older people” are preferred over elderly, seniors or senior citizens as a general description when relevant.